October, 2022
No matter how much you aspire to just letting thoughts pass by, there are times when thoughts just cycle and cycle. I’m not really one for mantras or guided meditations, but sometimes I need a little help to stop the spinning. Some might say that sitting with the discomfort of the obsessive thoughts is the best way to ultimately move past them, but sometimes I just need a circuit breaker. Lately I’ve been using my own version of “be here now”.
Here’s what I do – I repeat silently to myself, as often as I need to, these questions and answers:
Who am I? I am Kate
Where am I? I am here
When am I? I am now
How am I? I am well
What works for me might not work for you, but pretty much all of us at some point might need a little help staying grounded in the moment. What’s your way?
September, 2022
Summer always feels short, and there are always things we wish we had done when the weather was just right, regardless of the season. This picture might be surprising to a lot of people who have an idea of what life is like in a big northern city, especially one that is a favorite media punching bag right now. This is my front yard. This is my Chicago. And this summer, I remembered to take the time, more than I have in the past, to walk across the street from my high rise, put my toes in the sand, and watch the boats, the waves, and a city. Cities are living proof of both the messiness of lots of people living together and the genius and beauty they can create, and when I get to have this and the sand and the water too, I feel pretty blessed and right at home.
September, 2022
I’m carrying on with revisiting some old mixed media paintings – some I knew were unfinished, some I thought might be unfinished. It’s really fun to reword these. This one is an example of a piece I thought might be finished some time ago, but either I was wrong or I have changed since then, because it just demanded to be reworked. It’s always a surprise to see what form that takes – in this case it was clearly more than just a few tweaks. Is it better now, or just different? Am I better now, or just different? More to come.
September, 2022
Like I’ve said before, your body will talk to you a lot when you meditate. My body talks a lot louder than my thoughts, and even though I know it is a good idea to be “in touch” with you body, sometimes I miss the times when I had no awareness of it at all. Then again, maybe some of that is just that it gets louder as you get older, whether you meditate or not. I usually position my hands either upright on my thighs, or palms down on my thighs, or sometimes with my hands cupped in front of me. More than once, I’ve suddenly noticed that my hands have clenched into fists, the exact opposite of the relaxed, intentional posture you’re looking for. I don’t have any particular wisdom to share about how to prevent it, just notice and relax. What I can tell you thought, is that the more often I catch it in meditation, the more often I catch it during the rest of my day – finding some part of me that is clenched tight for no apparent reason. I take it (in a purely non-scientific way) as an indication that my fight or flight response has been triggered, or in my case, spends most of its time triggered, and that’s just not sustainable, at least not without consequences.
August, 2022
Well, I sort of stayed home in August. One quick day trip from Chicago over to Grand Rapids to attend a quilt exhibit and show. Great inspiration pieces and a great opportunity to do a little exhibit hall shopping as usual.
This was the unexpected bonus – it was a beautiful day for driving. I live in a city so I don’t drive much, and when I do it’s usually in the passenger seat with the boyfriend/husband, and it’s usually a lot of fun. But this time, I was in the driver’s seat, and it was just what I needed. My NPR time, my music, and I surprised myself with how much I really needed to sing and shout out loud where no one could hear me (not recommended when you live in a high rise!) Simple pleasures.
